Wall Street is staring at 2025 like it’s a bad blind date—unpredictable, awkward, and probably about to go sideways. Analysts are scratching their heads, admitting they’re clueless about where the markets are headed.

The last few years have been a nonstop carnival of surprises, and nobody is brave enough to pretend they know what’s coming next. Well except for Jimmy Cramer.

This time last year, who could’ve guessed the S&P 500 would explode by almost 30%? Or that inflation, which hit like a freight train in 2021, would be yesterday’s news?

Now, with global equities taking a breather and Europe’s benchmark index ending an eight-day streak, all eyes are on U.S. inflation data dropping tomorrow. The market is desperate for any clue about what the Federal Reserve might do with interest rates. Spoiler alert: nobody knows.

The chaos continues in global markets

China is trying to save the day—or at least its own economy. Economists expect Beijing to cuts interest rates deeper than they have since 2015. The Chinese government has promised to prop up growth, but the initial rally it caused already ran out of gas. Investors are nervous, and it’s showing.

Wall Street’s big brains at Deutsche Bank are still scratching their heads about the last few years. Pandemic chaos wrecked 2020 predictions. Nobody saw 2021’s inflation monster coming. Rate hikes in 2022? Total curveball.

And let’s not even start on how the U.S. economy managed to flex its muscles through 2023. Now, 2025 is around the corner, and the only consensus is that there isn’t one.

The Federal Reserve, for its part, is caught in a debate over tariffs. Javier Bianchi from the Minneapolis Fed has a wild take: let inflation run hot to counteract the effects of import duties. He says stimulating the economy could boost incomes and keep people spending. Sure, why not throw another wrench into the machine?

Crypto runs hot

Crypto’s wild ride continues. Bitcoin is still steep in correction, currently sitting around $92,680. The entire market has been basking in the glow of Trump’s election win and spot Bitcoin ETFs.

BlacRock’s IBIT ETF, which launched last year, has already hit $52 billion in assets—more than 50 European ETFs combined. Daily options trading for $IBIT is averaging $1.7 billion. It has been an outstanding year for cryptos.

The same cannot be said with certainty about traditional markets. Only 17% of S&P 500 stocks have outperformed the index this month. Let that sink in. That’s the worst market breadth since at least 1986. Over 400 stocks in the S&P 500 have done worse than the index in December.

Eight out of 11 sectors have tanked more than 5%. The equal-weighted S&P 500 is down 6.6% compared to the index’s 2.1% drop. The rally is dead, and no one’s pretending otherwise.

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